False Emotions
by Lady-0f-Time
Summary: A demon bound to a human...somthing rather laughable. Strange emotions, what does it mean to be human? it takes a child and another immortal creature to show him what it truelly means. rated T to be safe...
1. When darkness falls

Chapter 1

It was a normal day at the phantomhive mansion. Sebastian had just made breakfast. Pluto was sleeping and ciel had told Sebastian to take the day off. It had been the one day he's allowed per month.

He stood in his quarters staring out his window, reflection unseen. Gently he removed his gloves and ran his tan hand through his silky raven hair. Soon he'd have a meal worthy of the gods…of hell. He smirked at the thought, placing his hand on the crimson curtains that adorned his room.

He longed for more, he may be one "hell "of a butler but he still was a demon. Vermin, scum…foul beings and he wanted to be more. As much as he "despised" the red headed shinigami he envied him. For he had power, a life that he, Sebastian Michaelis, could never own

The sky was crying, or so it seemed. Grabbing his jacket he stepped out into the cold. Reflecting on his life and realized that he wanted to love…more than anything. Was he truly incapable of such feats? Truly a beast bound by his hunger? He was going to try…trying and proving everyone wrong. Though playing with your food is considered improper, was there anything proper about a demon?

That night Sebastian undressed and dressed ciel for bed and lifted his candles.

"Is there anymore need of my services?"

"No you may leave"

"As you wish" he left quietly as he walked to his room. He had about 5 hours to lie in his bed before the morning's preparations. He lit the candles in his room and bathroom staring into the mirror as he undressed. Thoughts overwhelmed him. He placed his hand over his heart and felt it beat. The life he had was fake. Standing there now in only his pants he looked deeply into the mirror.

Deep down he wanted the façade to be real all the way. The smooth skin beneath his hand was warm-empty. He was whatever his master had wanted him to be, so why wasn't he like this on his own? Unbound he had no thoughts like a humans or like these now…did he? He splashed cold water on his face and looked back in the mirror. He was going to take a chance.

About two hours into his sleep he began to feel strange emotions and even awoke from the strangest dream.

"What is this" he ran his hands through his hair trying to find his breath again.

"SEBAS-CHAN!" he knew that voice. Quickly he lit his candles and looked around the room, empty. That voice echoed in his head, the accursed dream. He laid on his side facing the candles for a while, he remembered the touch, the lingering scent "why" he thought.

"Sebastian" came a soft tired voice. Sebastian rolled over and propped himself up on un-sleeved arms.

"Yes my lord?" he answered

"I can't um…I-uh can't sleep" Sebastian slid up to a sitting position and motioned for ciel to sit on the bed.

"Nightmares? Or perhaps-weakness?" Sebastian chuckled a little. Ciel, being half asleep didn't recognize the taunt.

Sebastian looked over to the window and at the lighted clouds thunder rumbled softly as he felt a weight come over him. He tossed backed into reality he looked down. The small boy had passed out and fell onto Sebastian's lap. Sebastian smiled and laid ciel next to him and placed the blanket over his body. He had sensed a storm coming.

He looked over at the figure beside him…earl ciel phantomhive. Gently he ran his hand over ciels' head, closing his eyes and taking in the moment. Surely this would never happen again.

"Sebastian..." he opened his eyes to the warm lit room and then down at his master. He was about to get up to start his daily preparations

"y-yes?" he stopped

"Don't leave" ciel grabbed Sebastian's arm and slightly opened his eyes.

"I have to ma-"

"No, you don't" ciel held on tighter.

"Yes my lord" Sebastian smirked and laid back o his pillows. "Maybe he'll laugh" he thought. "What a lovely spice"

And as fast as he laid down he felt ciel places his arm on his chest and move closer

"Young master?"

"Don't worry yourself" ciel replied.

They laid there in the darkness and silence as the candles burned down. Their steady breathing calmed Sebastian, both drifting to sleep.

Sebastian didn't understand his or his master's emotions. Ciel had become dependant on him, in more ways than one. Ciel only laid with Sebastian, but his emotions called for more than Sebastian could give him, as a demon and butler. He began to enjoy this need, he was being wanted even as a demon.

Soon Sebastian realized that ciel was possibly using him beyond the contract, building a bond so he couldn't break it. Sebastian had to either accept it or break it. He couldn't break it…that would only hurt his young master more. Not until the end.


	2. His butler, contracted

Chapter 2

The days passed and ceils emotions grew. As there rough calloused emotions faded they revealed something more. A child in need, Sebastian noticed but tried not to. And so he sat and dark morning away with the cat that came by.

"Do you think this is wrong" Sebastian explained to the cat.

"Mew?" he chucked not realizing he had been talking to a cat. He didn't want to take advantage of the boy; at least no more than the contract said he had to.

"Time to wake up my lord" he pulled back the curtains and ciel pulled the covers over his face.

"There seems to be a problem, I can't find my master" Sebastian joked.

Ciel forgot that his demon rarely joked and started to giggle beneath the blankets.

"Sebastian" he whined as he pulled the blankets off his head.

"Yes my lord?" the words snapped ciel back into their reality.

"Never mind" came a harsh reply.

Freezing ran began falling into the early evening and Sebastian couldn't shake off his odd

Dreams…if ciel wasn't with him he would have the same odd dream over and over again. And the problem was that it played at emotions that he never knew he had.

"Sebastian the door"

"Understood" he walked down and answered the door, the handle emitting a gold chill as he opened it.

"Sohma-san? Agni?" what are you doing here?" he said quietly.

"Ahhh my friend Sebastian, we happened to be in London and thought we would pay you guys a visit" Sohma said

"Please come in" Sebastian motioned for them to enter. Lau and ciel where already in the dining hall when the other three walked in.

"Tell me earl, have you ever seen the sunrise?" Lau rambled taking a puff of his pipe.

"No I haven't." Ciel said monotonously

"Eh, such beauty, majestic and fierce like the tiger…and gentle like a cub" Lau laughed

"So I have heard." Ciel tapped his fingers annoyed.

Prince sohma dashed out of Sebastian and Agni's reach and hugged ciel

"Ciel! CIEL!" he shouted with tears.

"Hmm let go!" ciel demanded.

"It's been to long!"

"Please let my master go" Sebastian smiled and placed dinner in front of everyone. Soon Sohma was distracted by the fancy dinner and sat down.

"Enjoy" Sebastian said. Everyone had seemed to have programmed emotions but Sebastian did not.

Because of the guest, ciel stayed in his room that night. Sitting down on his bed, the demon sighed. 

"Maybe this sin why demons shouldn't have emotions" he whispered. Though his emotions were unclear his needs were not. The dream that night ate away at him the next day. He wasn't as "on top" of things that a butler of the phantomhive mansion should be.

"Sebastian is something wrong?" ciel asked that cold afternoon.

"No, my lord." He covered up with a fake smirk.

"It seems another murderer is killing girls..." said ciel; he flipped through several pieces of paper.

"This truly hurts her majesty." Ciel sighed. "I thought Grell was jack the riper."

"He was…this must be another person." Sebastian replied.

"Then we have to find suspects."

"Yes my lord, now?"

"No, we have a guest." Ciel looked up from his papers towards the door.

"As you wish" Sebastian stayed still as an almost pleasant scent reached his nose. The air ran thick then suddenly the tall decorated doors flung open.

"What is it…Grell Sutcliffe?"

"What! You don't seemed pleased to see me." He moaned. Ciel sighed and continued reading.

"Entertain our guest." Ciel ordered

"Yes young master"

"ahh isn't it a lovely day Sebas-chan!" Grell chimed dancing rather oddly around the room

"I don't have time for such things" he mumbled. Grell crept closer to Sebastian and wrapped his arms around his neck.

"Please let go" Sebastian knocked Grells' arm away. "Were you in any way involved with the recent murders?" he demanded

"Is that anyway to talk to a lady?" Grell took several steps back and crosses his arms.

"Get him" ciel shouted.

"I don't like the idea-" Grell started.

"Yes my lord." Scarlet eyes made contact with Grells' and within moments he had been pinned to the wall.

"OH Sebastian!" Grell smirked at the weight pinning him. Sebastian tried to knock out Grell but the shinigami struggled more that it seemed to be worth. Soon he found an opening and knocked him across the head. 

"It wont be long" was the last thing the read headed shinigami heard.


	3. To be or not to be

Chapter 3

Grell awoke in a cold damp room. The smell was rather unpleasant. Trying to focus, he saw the demon in the corner opposite of him. Several wall candles illuminated the small four walled room.

"W-where am I?" Grell asked. He tried to shake off the fear as the demon stood up.

"Hnn?" he smiled and walked over to Grell removing his gloves. Tears welled up in the shinigami's eyes.

"D-d-don't come any closer" he shouted.

"You don't want me here?" Sebastian faked a sad voice and looked down at Grell, who was now crying. Suppressing his own wants and desires he reached down and grabbed a bit of Grell's shirt and pulled him off the ground.

"Seba-"

"You murdered those girls didn't you?"

"N-no! I didn't" grell grabbed Sebastian's arm and tried to move. "I was being detained for my actions! I had nothing to do with them." Tears streaked down Grells face.

Forgetting his own reasons, Sebastian tossed grell into the other corner of the room. He had looked like a small rag doll when he hit, sending a small un-noticeable shock through Sebastian.

"p-p-please!" he begged trying to fix himself; he knew William couldn't save him here.

"Ohh, I love it when you beg" Sebastian walked over to Grell and slid his fingers up his hest and across his chin. He let them rest on his lips

"Don't you understand?" Sebastian leaned in to whisper. "I don't believe you…" he smiled and stood up. Grell gasped and then covered his face with his hands. 

"D-d-don't, please don't!"

"Prove it"

"What?" 

"Its plain English shinigami, prove it!" he laughed for a moment "don't you understand?" Sebastian picked up a mocking voice and stared down at the death god.

"William took me and punished me, it's the first time I've been to earth in weeks!"

"How can I trust you?"

"He took my weapon, the only thing that can kill a shinigami"

"Hehe the angel of death pleading for its life…how amusing."

"Please believe me!"

"Then show me!"

"Show you what" Grell shouted in return.

"SHOW ME!" Sebastian pulled Grell off the floor again and demanded that the wounds be shown. The red head removed his shirt and dropped it to the floor.. Bruises, cuts and a set of stitches covered his body,

"What more do you want!" Grell stood there and cried more as he pleaded with the demon.

"Kill me and you will suffer!" he tried to threaten.

"I am a demon, master of pain, your threats mean nothing" outside the cellar footsteps came closer. Sebastian turned his head as the cellar door opened. 

"Grell's innocent…so he says" 

"probably guilty" Ciel commented.

"What do you want me to do with him?"

"Whatever you like, just don't bother me with him"

"yes my lord" his eyes shimmered and he turned back to Grell. 

"let me nurture those wounds." He grabbed Grell's wrist and pulled him close, slowly sliding his finger over his chest and onto the stitches that adorned his collar bone. Gently Sebastian pulled them out listening to grell scream..

"You let me go!" he demanded.

"I wouldn't be very good at my job now would i?" he laughed and stared into Grell's eyes.

"I am a demon after all." Sebastian leaned into Grell's neck and licked off the blood slightly smearing it with his tongue.

"First time I've tasted a gods blood…I wonder how your flesh tastes." He played around with the blood a little before reopening a wound on his arm.

"Please, please stop it"

"I love my snack a little feisty."

"I don't want to die" Grell began to black out but Sebastian ignored this. He soon realized that a sick and dying snack was suitable.

"Let go!" Grell lost his footing and collapsed. Sebastian had caught him and gently placed him down on the ground. 

"You really are pathetic."

"Maybe I should die"

"Why do you say that?" he questioned.

"Because I am going to die, you're going to kill me." He mumbled. The demon looked at him, showing no emotion to the dying shinigami.

"How exactly are you dying?" he was curious, so he knelt down to the red head.

"You reopened wounds made by a shinigami's weapon." Sebastian stood up and walked to the door as grell was about to pass out. He knew that with that motion the shinigami would think he'd leave him there to die and that would be his sleeping thoughts as he passed out.

When Grell woke up he didn't know where he was. He could hear the birds chirping and the soft rustling of leaves.

"Hello?" he called. Grell opened his eyes to see a room well decorated.

"How do you feel?" the voice stared. The shinigami quickly looked around and to his surprise he locked eyes with the devil, Sebastian.

"You bastard, you could have killed me"

"But I didn't, I saved your life"

"From you!" he grew angry. He dint know what to say or do.

"When you feel better ill let you run" Sebastian said and gave Grell a smile. He closed his eyes and turned around. 

"Why"

"Why what," Sebastian replied.

"I…I loved you, why would I run." He said sadly. Sebastian walked over to the side of the bed.

"Well, if you don't run, I might be forced to kill you…" he added another demon smile. There had been a long silence, and grell became insistent on ignoring the demon.

The next day when Grell was supposed to leave was very quiet. The demon escorted the red head off the grounds.

"You could have"

"But I didn't" he whispered.

"Why?" Grell turned around at looked into Sebastian's cold eyes.

"Merely a whim"

"You can't lie to me demon…" Grell whimpered.

"You're right." A twisted grin ran across his face. "I lied." He leaned forward and kissed Grell… he was working hard to suppress his own needs. He broke the kiss and walked away leaving Grell standing silent, speechless.

"Yo-you bastard." He mumbled.

-….

"You reek." Ciel said. Sebastian felt embarrassed and left co clean himself up.

He let the shower run hot before stepping in. He pulled his wet hair back and stood there for minutes in solitude.

"Damn it!" he cursed. He remembered the dreams…the night in the cellar and the sweet departing kiss. "What have I done?"

He remembered his master, the needy child he "loved", the nights with him and the desire for his soul. He touched the contract on his left hand.

"Can I?" he would soon have his soul, but he didn't want the loss of his master. He finally saw what it meant to be human.

The end.


End file.
